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Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Marriage Life Following Cheating And Working It Out With One Another

There were times when you considered yourself and your significant other as teammates. A good solid unified group working together. When it was good you felt that the two of you could overcome any and all obstacles. Your self-confidence would grow after removing whatever barrier not to mention the love for your significant other only got stronger.

The affair shattered all of that. You are very suspect of everything your marriage partner says and on top of that your self-worth has taken a major hit. You start to doubt yourself about the most insignificant things. If you cannot find the right solution the self-worth diminishes even further. That is the type of harm infidelity in a relationship can do.

One of the foundations to rebuilding after cheating in a relationship is understanding how to recommit to one another. There are many ways to do this but listed below are a few which need to be tops on your list.

1. Write It Down

Just like a legal contract where you agree to do x in exchange for y, writing down your commitment on paper will help a great deal when you are restoring the marital relationship. Develop a mutually agreed upon proclamation then sign it with each mate bearing witness. Afterward put it in a place of prominence in your household. Also make a concerted effort to read it on a regular basis. Make sure to do this together whenever possible. Doing so has the potential to center your concentration while strengthening the level of determination.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Is Love A Relationship?

I have no idea what 'love' is, and I don't think I can ever get anywhere close to knowing it, for it's difficult to comprehend anything that means so many different things to so many different people. All that one can do is speculate about what it can possibly be.

When does an intense liking for something become capable of being described as 'love' is completely beyond me. How is 'love' different from an intense liking for someone combined with an addiction-like longing for the person? The nagging desire to have the person around all the time is considered 'love', and then comes a time when one doesn't want his or her 'love' around as much as before. The other party complains of neglect, the fights start and the lovers start liking each other less and less progressively. This kind of getting-used-to spoils the broth that love is. So, does love last only as long as the freshness lasts, after which one starts looking for something else to love? Is love just about the novelty?

Most of the lovers of 'love' would denounce such crass ideas about something as 'great' and 'divine' as 'love'. But in the real world that's precisely what happens and it's called 'love'. Yes, one can always say it's not 'love' or is not 'true love', in which case there have to be two kinds of 'love' -- 'true love' and 'worldly/untrue love'. Or, may be, 'divine love' and 'physical love' are the two kinds of distinct 'loves'. But that doesn't solve anything for to say that 'physical love' is different from 'divine love' might mean that there is nothing divine about physical love, in which case one might be implying that nothing reproductive is divine. So, how does divine sanction of marriages work? Marriages are considered God-endorsed by all such religions that believe in God. And if there is something divine about 'physical love', how can it be excluded from the category of 'divine love' or 'spiritual love' unless one wishes to say that 'spiritual love' refers to the love between the spirits presupposing that spirits are capable of such a thing.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Relationships: How to Create Rock-Solid Love - That Just Keeps Getting Better!

Know wherever you find yourself; it's not an accident that you are there. We all are creating it all, all of the time-our love life is no exception. And wherever you want to be regarding love, you can create it. The very best relationship you can imagine can be yours, once you become conscious in your creations. Here are some magical tips to skyrocket your love life, no matter where you find yourself on the "Love-O-Meter": YOU HAVE A RELATIONSHIP BUT IT COULD BE BETTER. So many find themselves in this place-you have a partner but you're not as happy in the partnership as you'd once dreamed. What to do? Do this:

Own your power. People in ongoing partnerships find it easy to fall into the "blame game". "So and so does thus and such... aren't they awful?" "Don't you feel sorry for me... " and "What can I do when I have a partner like mine?"

Well, the truth is, you are creating your partner. I know, he or she is creating it too-it's a paradox-both are true. But in order to change your relationship you must approach it as if you are the only one creating it.

Get your mad out. Ask yourself if you have any old, unresolved issues with your partner. If so, write them a letter expressing your hurt, anger, etc. When you are done with the letter, burn it.

In order to move into a positive future, you need to let go of the past. For good. Obviously if you need to talk with your partner about these issues, do so... but nine times out of ten the issues have been talked to death already. Time to let them go.

Get clear about what you want. I know you say you want a loving, giving, caring and intimate partnership. But I've seen plenty of couples that really want to argue. Plenty of others that only want to be right. Still others who want to control their mate.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Love's Emotions

"Love is heavy and light, bright and dark, hot and cold, sick and healthy, asleep and awake - it's everything except what it is!" (Act 1, scene 1) William Shakespeare. Romeo and Juliet

Oh that William Shakespeare certainly had something going on. And then present day researchers have something to say about it!

Easy as it is to want to analyse Shakespeare's poems and sonnets or plays like Hamlet or Macbeth and cite the omnipotent "to be or not to be," "The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune," and "To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow."

Shakespeare revolutionized human emotion and conflict simply by his dramatics, words and passion he weaved into his works. He brought to us the "why do we crave love so much, even to the point that we would die for it?"

Refraining from refuting scholars who have studied the works of Shakespeare indelibly, let us hugely celebrate the high school principals and teachers who year after year bring this mysterious Literary King into a teen's mind and heart. They are deserving for making it part of a youth's coming of age while trying to spring forward a sneak peek at the understanding of the complexities of love and human emotions.